A secret I've kept for years
There’s something I haven’t quite spoken up about yet - mainly because it's something rather extreme that would cause many to look at me sideways.
But the reality is…this is my truth and part of the work I came here to do. (And thanks to menopause, I now give approximately zero hoots about what people think.)
You see, I’ve lived a whole other life outside of being a naturopathic doctor and energy healer. My closest circle knows the stories - they’re the ones who support me (and hear me complain, lol).
For the past few years, the dark has had my name - ever since the pandemic when I refused to comply and became outspoken in ways that did not please the forces that prefer silence.
That period taught me something very real, in a very physical way: evil exists.
There have been mornings where I’ve woken up feeling cut off from God/Source, covered in an energetic tar, exhausted to my bones, unable to see clearly through the fog in front of my eyes. Negative thoughts. Hopelessness. A feeling of being spiritually “blocked.”
Nights where I’ve opened my eyes to find small scratches across my chest. Dreams where I’m wrestling with a demon, only to wake up like I'd had a full body weight lifting session.
Spiritual battle is real.
No, this “work” doesn’t come with a paycheck, but I do believe it’s part of my calling - to bring light into spaces most people refuse to acknowledge exist. As the saying goes: the biggest trick evil ever pulled was convincing people it doesn’t exist.
And that denial leaves the door wide open - which is why the heaviness, the fog, the distraction, the pull toward materialism, and the collective disconnection feel so palpable right now.
The spiritual battles always intensify for me this time of year, but this year I feel more prepared. I’m bouncing back faster than ever, staying connected, and even felt my first true post-battle victory high - suddenly those medieval, wine-soaked post-war celebrations feel oddly relatable.
I'm grateful I've always managed to find my way out of the darkness. My connection to God, Light, and Source has only grown stronger as this has played out. The most potent antidote to that evil “tar” has been returning to mass. (Yes - I’m an opportunistic, eclectic Catholic who also hugs trees and is passionate about Buddhist practice. Why choose? Side-eye away. lol.)